No matter when she gets up she doesn't have enough time, but 7am seems to work most of the time.
I woke up feeling like crap, tired, headachey, nauseous. I really wanted a few minutes of quite and hope to get my head together (toss one off). She lays in bed yapping and yapping about who knows what, the kids keep coming in asking for milk, and I keep saying "arent you going to get up?". But she keeps laying there yapping about how she wants to lay in bed just as much as I do (this is the woman that lays there typically 2-3 hours on the weekend after I get up).
Finally I say "fuck it" and get up and hit the shower.
There is this new soap dispenser hanging from the shower. She spent $60 on battery powered dispensers already for the kitchen and bathroom, and since I asked her to send them back she buys one for my shower - great. Feel the love and respect.
Well, I groggily push the little button on the thing and nothing happens. WTF? I try to mess around with the nozzle but cant get it to work - wait a minute, is this thing beeping? WTF? beep..............beep.......beep
I lean in to listen closer because I cant really hear it over the shower. Now the beeping seems closer to together beep.....beep..beep.beepbeepbeep - what the hell, the nozzle starts spinning around and around and whirring like a bomb on 24 right before it explodes!!! - this isnt a soap dispenser, it is one of those worthless shower cleaner things!
I try to dodge behind the shower spray but still catch the cleaner full on in the face and across the lips - nice start to me day - I can still taste the shit.
Not only that, my wife paid $25 for the thing and the spray doesn't even reach the back of the shower!
Wives are -EV.
