Hey bro,

Just a word on your school situation. After having spent about 30 years in a row in some type of school situation as well as teaching high school and college the best advice I can give you is don't sweat the small shit. I am a perfectionist, or at least once was when it came to school. I graduated with a 4.0, Summa Cum Laude, with a triple major of philosophy, biology and history as an undergrad in 3 years. I studied my ass off, spending 16 hours a day one summer for 10 weeks in Organic Chemisty. When I finished that course I could walk into any chemical lab and make anything possible with organic products, two weeks later I would have had a hard time making salt water. I spent over 100 hours in ONE week studying for a Wetland Ecology and Aquatic Plant final exam. In naval nuclear power school I put in over 80 hours counting classroom time EVERY week for 6 months. Bottom line I was an academic freak of nature that wouldn't settle for doing a mediocre job or have anyone perform better than me in the classroom but would I do it again and sacrifice some other pleasures along the way for academic supremacy. Given my nature it is hard to say that I wouldn't put forth the same effort but I can see the positives of not doing so much work as well as the vast majority of all the stuff I learned is now lost in some wasteland part of my brain, never to be used again. As far as your class goes with the majority of folks not acing the exam don't worry about that just spend the time necessary for YOU to get the job done. Most universities are a joke when it comes to giving out grades for classes. Most people are not A and B students in truth. Most people are average by definition but almost all have the capability to perform past that level if they set their mind to do so. If you make a C in that class it is not the end of the world but ask yourself did I put in my best effort in getting that C. If the answer is yes then go on about your business and don't worry about the end result. I have a Ph.d in Biology and can tell you a shit load of stuff about a thousand esoteric things in botany but looking back at my academic career the most important things that I have learned all came from my philosophy and literature classes. Find a copy of On the Nature of Things by Marcus Aurelius and read it. One of the most important thoughts I have ever read came from that work and it is very simple. I don't remember the exact translation but it goes something like this. People can't really hurt you because all injury is really just in your mind and since you control your mind you can control whether or not you feel the pain. Learn to control that pain you are feeling at the poker table and in life because when all is said and done there is not a whole lot of shit that really matters except having a good time and being good to yourself and your friends.

I went to Hollywood Casino in Shreveport to play live a few months ago. It was a $2/$5 game with $300 buy in.

I swear that the players are the worst Ive ever seen. I doubt that many of them would even know how to log onto the internet, let alone play poker there.

I think they may have watched a WPT event once or twice.

But I still lost 3 buy ins. Some days are just like that. Im going back very soon

Thanks for the kind word all, I had just gotten back from the casino, and I was really frusterated, as you could tell. I really shouldnt have played at all after having a frusterating week and playin live was a bad idea. As for school, Piers. is right that I shouldn't sweat the small stuff, but I really cant help it. UCSD is a very competitive program to get into and there are a lot of very smart people I am competing against. Because of this the class's are super hard, with the cost of tution being $15,000 not passing class's is a very expensive proposition. Now i have to go into two finals knowing that I have to do decently well to pass these class's and failing is not an option. For me personally, I have never taken failure well, I was always the type of person that punched lockers and threw bats/gloves etc when things didnt go well. Playing poker has helped a little but still something I need to improve on. I am going to be in SLO til monday so I wont be playing for a couple of days except the BTP tourney, on Wednesday if I can get my program done I am going to go back and play lucky lady again and well see what happens. I really have no right to bitch about my luck, I have played 6 session at the lucky lady in the last 4 weeks and in 38.5 hrs I'm $2400 in profit.

You know I read everything on this forum so I just wanted to say to keep posting and tough break there.

Wow Brian you do have to much free time at work. I can barely keep up with everything in the NL section. I like having this journal even if no one reads it, writing a good way to release stress, and its good to be able to go back and read your own comments.

I know the feeling with my own journal, but yes, I do have THAT much time at work.

Went and played my normal NL game at the lucky lady. When I got there there was no NL game so I played $3/$6 limit, that was pretty weird. I felt lost, but the table was full of really bad players. I was up $100 before I lost a $150 kill pot wth a str8 on the turn and a redraw to the nut flush, to a guy calling with a bigger gut shot. I left the limit game up about $30.

The NL game was different than usual, the table was very tight to strart with and I almost left, luckily two fish decided to come from one of the limit games just in time. Weird day made one str8 and that was the strongest hand I made but somehow I was up $280, I didnt flop a set all day, didnt have any PP higher than JJ. Days like these are weird, I made two good bluffs to win two nice pots. I won a decent pot with AK vs AQ with an A on the flop.

Another frusterating day, I played my usual 2/3 Nl game which was unusally tight. I played 4 hrs and only saw one PP, the good news is I flopped a set, the bad news is my opponant flopped a biggers set, thankfully she only bought in for $100 otherwise I would have gone broke. I won 5 hands in 4+ hrs, not a good day. One good hand, I flopped the nut straight with j10 vs a min raise preflop, I called the preflop bet, then check raised the the turn all in stil with the nuts and doubled up.

Then I played the SDSU homegame, this was a fun debacle. First hand I raise from utg with AA, get called by a really bad player from the SB, flop is 2210 2 diamonds, and I have the A of diamonds, I lead $10 get called, king of diamonds on the turn, my opponant leads out this time, $10. I push him in for his last $32, he calls and turns over K10, then the K on the river, snap nice 4 outter in a $120 pot.

2nd big hand, one of the table morons min raises from UTG, gets 4 callers I call from the button with A10. Flop is KQJ with two spades, raiser checks, another player bets $5, I call trying to draw in a couple more callers. Min-raiser raises to $20, now I think I'm golden thinking he has AK or AQ or maybe KQ. I push in for another $40 hr calls instanly and turns over A10 of spades, lucky moron I'm free rolling his flush draw which hits on the river, bye bye 2nd $60.

Ugly day in generla though I only lost $200 on a really bad day, so I guess it could be worse.

MVP, playing online and playing live are so different its hard to say which one I like better. When I play online, there is very little play involved, I play pretty ABC, at the $50 party tables no one gets a read on anyone else, people just play their cards. This obviously makes it a lot easier but at the same time, I love the small details that can give you an advantage playing live. The little things like watching someone hands when you bet, watching someons reaction to a turn or river card. These things that most players have no idea about that make ths difference between being a winning player and being a break even player. The one thing I do like a lot about playing online is I dont get bored as easlily, playing 4 tables at a time, I always have hands to play. Live can be boring/frusterating when you get one of those 2 hour runs of bad cards. So I guess I will say that I like both for different reasons, but cant really say one is a favorite. I guess I have made the majority of my bankroll playing live so that should mean something about which I'm better at.

Busy weekend for me. Friday played at my usualy 2/3 nl game which I fear is going to start turning into a rock fest. Its been open for a little over a month not and a lot of the really bad players seem to be gone. Game was pretty tight, so I got to play a little bit LAG. Made a couple of really goods reads. Ended up leaving up $110, decent day,

I went straight from the Lucky lady game to the SDSU home game. Didnt game many cards, got my str8 busted by a bigger gut shot which cost me $50, I bought back in for $100 and then came the following hand. Raised to $2 preflop I look down at , 5 callers in front of me, so I call. Flop is . Preflop raiser leads out $10, folds to me. I think for a min and decide to raise, I really think he has AA or KK. I raise to $30, utg check raises all in for $49, preflop raiser calls all-in. UTG is a rock and I'm pretty sure I'm in big trouble, but it is only $19 more and the pot is going to be over $150. UTG shows J10, which is pretty much what I expected, preflop raiser turns over AQ. Turn and river are spades and I get the rare pleasure in drawing out on someone. I have taken some monster bad beats at that game so I guess I was due one.

Next day, I decided that I was a litte burned on NL, so I went and played $3/$6 O8, This is a really juicy game, I ended up $220, not a back 8 hrs work. One funny but dumb hand, kill pot so its $6/$12. I look down at what I think is A239 suited to the A on the button. I call, killer who is in the sb raises. As usual everyone calls. Flop is 444, so now I have a backdoor low but no draw to a boat. It checks around to me I check. Broadway card on the turn, checks around again. 6 on the river, I'm now starting to think my A9 is the best high hand, so when it checks to me, I bet. Get two callers, turn it over and say A9, to bad when I look back at my hand its A249, oops I had the quad and checked it twice. The preflop raiser had AA, glad he didnt bet the turn I would have folded.

Last beautifull hand. I limp with [10h]. New player raises from the button, 5 way pot and I call. Monster flop for me . Nut str8 with the royal redraw, checks to the button who bets, 2 callers one of whom Ive played with all night and I'm pretty sure he has the same str8 I do. Turn is beautifull , check to button who bets again, 1 calller in between, I raise, button 3 bets, player in the middle calls all in, I 4 bet puting button all in. Button snaps over AK, I think he must have never played o8 before, in between player has the st8 with 23 for a low draw, river is a 10 and I scoop. Button is pissed and leaves the table saying he will never play this BS game again. Kind of funny

Overall a decent weekend, made about $450 in live action games.

Ok well here is my new plan. I have my last final on thursday june 9. After that I am free, well at least free until my summer school class starts on Aug 1. So here is the plan, my bankroll situation is a little different than most, I have made enough playing in the last couple of years that I should be playing a bunch of levels higher than what I am currently playing. I have been continueing to play at the same level and keep the exact same bankroll, which is about $3000. All the money I win beyond that I have been taking out to pay bills, and later in the year rent.

So here it goes from the end of school to the begginning of summer school. I am going to play a lot of poker, I really need a laptop for school and right now it is way outside of my budget, my goal is for those 8 weeks I want to make $4000 with a combination of live and online game. With that I will buy a new laptop, and not be forced to cut even deeper into my bankroll to pay rent this summer. Wish me luck =)

Well this isnt really poker but hey this a a life journal, I finished my last final yesterday. Man I feel good today, it was a really stressfull couple of weeks. I feel like I lost 20 pounds walking out of my last final. I actually had a decent quarter so, it feels good. Well I'll report back on poker a little later.